I never truly knew how abused I was until I began to heal. This sacred personal work is prudent & detrimental to me, my husband, my daughter & the future legacy that follows. I decided that my children deserved a healthier loving legacy than the one I got adopted into, filled with secrets, lies, distorted beliefs & with its own legacy of unhealed trauma that brewed resentment & anger camouflage to come across as love.
i grew up in an adopted dysfunctional family having a narcissist as a mother.. out of the 3 of us, one of us was designated to play the role of the scapegoat otherwise referred to as the black sheep of the family..im pretty sure i willingly took turns playing that role with my younger sibling passing it back and forth whenever it was convenient and suitedContinue reading “over time i became a scapegoat survivor..”
I have been in family esk therapy now for over 5 months. It took admitting that we as a unit needed an intervention to help aid in our relationship as a “unconventional” family with highly toxic extremities. I have no shame in saying that sometimes there are things, people, behavior & situations that are outside your capacity of managing, being encouragedContinue reading “Beautifully Fucked Up”
I was reading an article that someone had shared on facebook the other day and it got me to thinking about expired relationships, and why some people choose to hold on to them after they are completely emotionally extinguished..im not a relationship expert and in fact I really sucked at it for a long while, im just simply fascinated by ourContinue reading “im not a relationship expert,and in fact I really sucked at it for a long while”
For a while, I was my own perpetrator, mismanaging my thoughts, feeling & beliefs about myself out of the misinformation I never bothered to fact check & just assumed to be true because of the packaging this information came from. I felt powerless to myself so I thought that aloud me to give into these beliefs while being my own worst enemy, giving the outside world permission to mirror the way I had once internally treated myself.