I always felt haunted in my own body by the ghostly feeling of these unresolved bleeding wounds of being given away. Even as a grown woman, I still needed & wanted answers that only she had the power to relinquish over me. What would make a mother want to give their child away was a very big question I had, especially becoming a mother of my own adding more emotions to wounds that would never seem to heal.
I have suffered many forms of this abuse throughout my life, causing me to question the lack of love & self worth I once had. In some unconscious capacity, I believed I deserved to be treated in this destructive manner, being adopted, feeling so unlovable & not being able to actually see the marks of abuse upon my skin but rather feel them in the deepest places of my psyche. My earliest form of love came at the hands of my adopted narcissistic mother, so knowing any differently was never my option, till much later in life when I met my now husband.
I had an epiphany yesterday after celebrating my husbands 42 birthday this past weekend. I realized in that singular moment of pure happiness that if those various suicide attempts I had tried way back when would have taken my life, I wouldn’t have be able to be where I am today. I would have missed out on such a beautiful lifeContinue reading “Life After Narcissistic Abuse”
A little & A lot has happened over quarantine these last few months, taking my flow of emotions from one place to another without apology or remorse since that’s the way life rolls. Instead I decided to become more vigilant to find the beauty in this unexpected event knowing that what was before, willContinue reading “The Unexpected Goodbyes Of Pandemic 2020”
Theres been a lot of what I call Corona Angry Entertainment during this lockdown, now actively unfollowing & choosing to socially distance my self even more so from most of the shit show network & social media nonsense. I decided for my own pursuit of optimism & happiness, to check out from the outlets that act like a peacockContinue reading “The Angry Entertainment Of Corona”
Ive had a LOT of time at home during this pandemic lockdown, going on 7 weeks of not being aloud to work & still seeing some of the optimism behind all of it. It has been work for me to unwind the minds perception of this horrible, draining situation as I constantly remind myself that eventually thisContinue reading “The Insightful Perk In My Quarantine.”
I got to see the sun again this morning ( HOORAY ), which is a good thing being that we are quarantined in Michigan. I just witnessed my 3rd full week of no incoming income go by as an independent, self employed, contractor manicurist so that’s been fun. The struggle is REAL for me, forContinue reading “WEEK 3 OF QUARANTINE”
I have had a few of my clients reach out to me during this isolation period, expressing to me how much they miss their time with me & their manicures. So I decided to make this tutorial to show people some easy steps at getting a pretty good home manicure from yourself. http://www.facebook.com/magicalmaven/videos/10157895895193145/Continue reading “Do it your self manicure tutorial”
I decided to hop on the beautiful band wagon of generosity that is blowing up all around the world in lieu of the 2020 CORONAVIRUS & do a FREE TAROT READING GIVEAWAY on my INSTAGRAM page (find me at MAGICALMAVEN2). 30 minute card reading valued at $55.00. * NO PURCHASE NECESSARY It’s really easy toContinue reading “THE CORONAVIRUS GENEROSITY BAND WAGON”
This decade is almost a wrap stepping into 2020 having done some massive personal healing and growth, restoring my mind body spirit connections with balance, harmony and unlimited amounts of unconditional love. If you saw where I was 10 years ago, you wouldn’t recognize me in that woman I’ve become today.. What I went throughContinue reading “10 years gone….buh BYE”