there are some people in good conscious who go through life imposturing a persona that they dream to be

  imagine yourself for a moment if you can, going to a place that you frequent because it is the swankiest hippest place that every body just wants to be apart of..nobody can say why exactly that makes its so fucking cool or put their finger on it, but who cares, its the IT place that every one talks about andContinue reading “there are some people in good conscious who go through life imposturing a persona that they dream to be”

I should have seen it coming this mean girl mentality

I was watching “vanderhumps ” the other night with my husband, and YES we completely watch that shit like the rest of you, when before our eyes it was like a “meangirls” moment of intense bitchieness where Katie the newest ring leader of the group, Kristen and Stasi were all ganging up on Sheana for simply talking to Lala at work in a prior episode…AS IF Katie hasContinue reading “I should have seen it coming this mean girl mentality”

YOU ARE THE REFLECTION OF THE COMPANY YOU KEEP.

I had a much needed, over the maximum amount, over due held in needed break down cry today.  I was sparked by a phone call from a reletive that was the tipping point and the stick that hit the camels back or whatever that saying is. I exploded my pain filled sobbing tears all over the phone to my husband (poor guy) whoContinue reading “YOU ARE THE REFLECTION OF THE COMPANY YOU KEEP.”

what is preventing you from climbing up the stairs of life

  lately I have been very overly preoccupied with myself and decided to take out my beloved cards and do some counter productive goodness and get back in touch with the part of me that has been missed while seeking messages for the outer world to hear..i pulled for a 3 card what is currently happening and going on in thisContinue reading “what is preventing you from climbing up the stairs of life”

the hidden meaning and message behind 5777..

there is a energetic meaning behind the Jewish New year number of 5777, sending out messages of infinite wisdom and clarity if you are capable enough to see them in the aspects to which they are presented to us, each individually and at specific times.. the number 5, has specific vibrations that influence your life changes that will inspireContinue reading “the hidden meaning and message behind 5777..”

every time I travel back to Israel, it allows me to rediscover the deep rooted love I have for this land in my every changing and growing spirit

life is funny some times, well most of the time if you have a grand sense of humor..it allows you to see things though a spectrum of joy instead of a negative stream of dull blinding light that only shows you the shadows of the situation instead of the whole grand vitality of your landscape.. life is everContinue reading “every time I travel back to Israel, it allows me to rediscover the deep rooted love I have for this land in my every changing and growing spirit”

The Harmful Effects Caused From The Opinions Of Others.

My first real informative memory of opinion outside my home life was my being held back in 1st grade & the humiliation is suffered with the same first grade teacher & on the playground with my peers.  I was teased, made fun of & called a lot of hurtful names for being stupid, retreating me to a place of make believe & isolation.  They must have been true if my entire educational system believed this of me, handicapping my entire school experience from there on out.  You would never know this now by meeting me today, what I had suffered from as a child.

I Cant Imagine What Its Like Being You In The Circle Of Us.

I have watched you over this time navigate a path that came with out directions, into a family that has continued over time to diminish & take away the role that you became.  Sometimes the universe unbeknownst to us, chooses the timing of a love to come into fruition regardless of the external forces, to teach its lessons in that kind of love.  I believe we have always been chosen in each life together, to show the world around us, this intimate most beautiful lesson, as difficult & painful as it’s been.

The Human Spirit Is The Most Remarkable Warrior

I have suffered many forms of this abuse throughout my life, causing me to question the lack of love & self worth I once had.  In some unconscious capacity, I believed I deserved to be treated in this destructive manner, being adopted, feeling so unlovable & not being able to actually see the marks of abuse upon my skin but rather feel them in the deepest places of my psyche.  My earliest form of love came at the hands of my adopted narcissistic mother, so knowing any differently was never my option, till much later in life when I met my now husband.