The (UN)Mothers Of This Day

I was at the post office dropping off a parcel for a customer & the woman who always rings me up wished me a Happy Mothers day as we finished the transaction.  I was walking away thanking her & quickly turned back around to ask if she herself was a mom, because truthfully you neverContinue reading “The (UN)Mothers Of This Day”

The Emotional Truth About Adoptees Grief & Invisible Loss

Being adopted, I’ve noticed in general we are hardly ever taught how to openly properly mourn & grieve our first greatest initial loss, that ends up dictating & effecting our entire emotional life afterwards.  Human emotions are built in stages during infancy, childhood & adolescence registering & governing the emotional information into our adulthood.  ThisContinue reading “The Emotional Truth About Adoptees Grief & Invisible Loss”

The Health Of Our Emotions

 Emotions can have the tendency to make us ill when gone unmanaged, not putting it together with the physical body.  Sometimes they can make one sick enough to physically change & alter the cellular movement of the body, generating illness out of the cause & effect of harmful mental emotional attributes that create havoc within theContinue reading “The Health Of Our Emotions”

National Adoption Awareness Month ~ Behind Closed Doors

I was adopted into a generational abusive dysfunctional family, having a narcissist for a mother & an enabler as a father.   Each one of their 3 adopted children were groomed & designed to play out of the roles designated by the monarch.  We unknowingly & willingly took turns throughout our lives in a triangulation of the goldenContinue reading “National Adoption Awareness Month ~ Behind Closed Doors”

November Is National Adoption Month ~ How I met My Biological Mothers Sister

Ever since I can remember I have been naturally curious & inquisitive about who I am & where I came from as someone adopted.  I have spent my lifetime looking at my features trying to imagine who I really look like & wondering if the people who gave me up wondered within their own featuresContinue reading “November Is National Adoption Month ~ How I met My Biological Mothers Sister”

November Is Adoption Awareness Month ~ My Biological Father Jack & The Gift In The Wake Of His Death

I was reunited with my biological father jack (who lived in the State of Washington) back in 2000 via snail mail, phone calls, email & eventually facebook 2 years after I legally opened my adoption file back in 1998.  My initial response to the lack of reception was heartache & disappointment that nobody showed interestContinue reading “November Is Adoption Awareness Month ~ My Biological Father Jack & The Gift In The Wake Of His Death”

November Is Adoption Month ~ The Problem With The Adoption Label

The first label that I was branded with was the one at my birth.  Its the one that identified me as being given away that I unknowingly carried with me throughout my life.  This one time adjective word allowed everyone & their mother to know I wasn’t the real child yet the one that wasContinue reading “November Is Adoption Month ~ The Problem With The Adoption Label”

The Wounds Of Adoption

I always felt haunted in my own body by the ghostly feeling of these unresolved bleeding wounds of being given away.  Even as a grown woman,  I still needed & wanted answers that only she had the power to relinquish over me.  What would make a mother want to give their child away was a very big question I had, especially becoming a mother of my own adding more emotions to wounds that would never seem to heal.

The Wounds Of Adoption

I always felt haunted in my own body by the ghostly feeling of these unresolved bleeding wounds of being given away.  Even as a grown woman,  I still needed & wanted answers that only she had the power to relinquish over me.  What would make a mother want to give their child away was a very big question I had, especially becoming a mother of my own adding more emotions to wounds that would never seem to heal.

Im About To Meet My Biological Mothers Sister, My Aunt

After some back & forth questions of my identity, the veil came down & together we embraced this unique reunion closing the circle to my biological mothers.  For over a few years now we have been in contact, making the gap between us seem a bit smaller but today that is about to change.  Jody (my aunt) is physically going to meet me this afternoon for the very first time & spend the week in Michigan getting know my family.  This again is another circle closed by the sister of my biological parent that could never make the journey themself.  Today Im going to meet my very own flesh & blood on my mothers side.