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I believe menopause is really the divine feminine transition to GODDESHOOD

I’ve started going through the natural “change” that woman in their late 40s early 50s begin to experience as I wipe the moisture from my brow while typing..Its the second time in the last few years my menstrual cycle has disappeared (4 months now) out of no where, this time adding in the annoying random hot flashes that periodically surge through my body all hours of the day, everyday..id like to think my body is preparing me for GODDESSHOOD of the divine feminine..

I’m really trying to contain my grace in these moments as I rip my clothes off to beat the flash, breathing in imaginary polar vortex air to visually cool the internal inferno burn that my overall body is feeling in these intense moment..i suppose when I really begin to think about it, my body is doing its natural job by preparing me for this ancient rite of passage leading up to the remarkable evolutionary transitioning of higher femaleness..Continue reading “I believe menopause is really the divine feminine transition to GODDESHOOD”

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Shopping for crystals? Here’s my top 5 tips for just starting out!

I’m obsessed with crystals and have been for the majority of my life, collecting, wearing and using them all the way back into my early teenage years..I cant pin point exactly the moment I first connected with the mineral kingdom, but I do know this love and fascination started back when I was a toddler, getting my first opal drop as a birthday necklace..

Now a days its quite trendy to be into crystals, drenched in their entirety and beauty..Every where you look they are making their way into mainstream life, offering up some powerful intention and manifestations for our mind, body, spirit and environment for our over all health and benefit..You can even shop for them now a days at “home goods” finding some really great pieces and specimens if you know what your looking for, or not..Continue reading “Shopping for crystals? Here’s my top 5 tips for just starting out!”

I found the courage to chop my hair..

I took a gamble and applied for a freelance writing content job on crystals last week, receiving the rejection letter in my email yesterday morning..The valuable thing about this momentary experience is that it got me thinking about all my faceted angles in life right now and what exactly I plan on doing with my crystal/reiki/healing thing that I currently have simmering on a back burner..

The idea of writing has always been a factor I have toyed with in my head for many years, leading me up to apply for something I might have felt was out of me league..I need to be done operating from the mindset at this level of feeling that every thing I desire is out of my reach and not mine for the taking..These small little steps I’m doing at reaching out for the things I want is really just a muscle exercise I’m willing to begin as a regimen to elevate my purpose and passion..Continue reading “I found the courage to chop my hair..”

is there such a thing as recovery guilt?

I haven’t written in a while, mostly because I have been in such a personal good space I didn’t feel like what I had to write about was as worthy as my pain and heart ach once was..how about that for some fucked up self belief system I have spent the last few years rebooting and rewiring that obviously still needs some major tweaking..

I was at my healer today for my monthly session and discovered the absurdity to this idea I have subscribed too that I hadn’t even realized i had until I heard the words breathed out from my mouth..I actually think I have a form of recovering guilt that prohibits me from expressing my happiness in writing, simply out of feeling bad that im no longer in that shitty space any more because I know so many people who still are..Continue reading “is there such a thing as recovery guilt?”

AGAINST ALL ODDS love always wins..<3

I got married 8 years ago tomorrow, marking a personal historical victory of actual marital success surpassing both previous ones in love, happiness, value and time..any thing is possible when you follow your heart and lead the way with the purity of absolute love..

The previous unions ironically were approved and blessed by my former parents, while this one they went to epic lengths to criticized, scrutinized and diminish in hopes of failure..so maybe that was the secret ingredient to its longstanding longevity and success (lol)..

You see, I had done this twice before, failing to maintain a partnership of being happy and ended up leaving both marriages regardless of the aftermath and the effects that followed..my mother would tell me how im just not marriage material, that I should just focus on being a mom not ever understanding the ultimate beauty to which I exist..

This union however (which was unsupported by my entire family except for my 2 brothers) originally took place as a secret with just a few people knowing..we didn’t even tell the kids in the beginning (who were being brainwashed of horrible things about us a couple) which was more so my decision, truthfully for personal reasons..as a 41 year old woman I was afraid of the repercussion and how it will be retaliated with impact from the opposing opposition that was looking to take me down..

They punished me for my acts of misbehaving to their ideas by cultivating an ally closeness to my ex husband while smearing my name together in hopes of ruining my reputation with my own children..my beautiful god sent husband was the only one there who knew how to pick me back up off the floor and love me through the angered darkness I found myself in..

Eran was the one who empowered my warrior spirit with his love and gave me the tools to rebuild myself after every body else had emotionally demolished and shit all over me..it wasn’t easy and at times was the darkest place to love me in but somehow with the grace of our martial magic, we found our seeds to grow together and be each others moonlight..

This marriage was literality built on the strongest rawest foundation of pure love that no man made material can compete with..

Here we are, 8 years later and I have never been happier! who knew my search for love and happiness would have ultimately lead to the destruction and sacrifice of a family and the ultimate comeback resurrection of my self that finally led me to this..

I toast my husband ERAN who never gave up on me, our kids, and this marriage (when at time I wouldn’t have blamed him if he did)..I toast him because he is a righteous man with a golden heart who took on more than most could ever handle successfully and smiling and proud 8 years later!! our immediate family today is filled with endless love and strength, courage and bravery, understanding and wisdom, faith and compassion, happiness, trust and patience..

Some times the way of the path is with thorns and storms, making it close to impossible to navigate and believe in..it is here you will find your greatest glory and love that will ultimately become your power source of eternal light if your willed enough to see it through..this is the path of pure love and what true heart and soul really looks like..peace love faith hope <3 <3 <3

 

 

 

 

Podcast fun with crystals and friendship!

yesterday I had the pleasured gift of being asked to be apart of my friends podcast GROW YOUR GURU, who is a psychotherapist for 27 years, an Imago therapist (relationship and communication expert), and a Robbins-Madanes Strategic Intervention Life Coach..

We explored together my journey through being a crystal lover to entering the realm of becoming a certified crystal healer.. enjoy ❤️🔮❤️ peace love faith hope

http://www.newradiomedia.com/lifestyles-page/grow-your-guru/

https://newradiomedia-recast.streamguys1.com/content/health_and_wellness/20190225170005-41-703-grow-your-guru-audio-broadcast.aac

 

 

New age is just the revival of ancient medicine..

 

I was in Tucson with my husband the first weekend of February for a 3 day intense course on shamanism and stones with master Jeffrey Yuen who is am 88th generation Daoist priest along with being a Classic Chinese medicine doctor and so much more. Some may refer to this kind of teachings as “new age”  but its actually simply the revival of ancient medicine (medicine that predates western medicine) which is being passed on and taught to people like my husband and I.

The bonus of this 3 day weekend, besides the teachings and wisdom of this course followed by the annual Tucson crystal and gem shows, was seeing my biological (maternal) aunt who lives in Phoenix and drove roundtrip to Tucson for dinner.  Its the second time in my life physically seeing this woman in person who I happen to share so many of my features with. Being adopted and forced to identifying with the family I was “sold” too,  was another profound healing moment of beautiful collective love that on a conscious and unconscious level, just works naturally and harmonically..Continue reading “New age is just the revival of ancient medicine..”

a massive energetic MOON BATH is upon us!

Get ready for a super cosmic energetic MOONBATH that’s going to be happening at the very very end of the weekend..The universe is handing you a perfect moment to do inner work for your renewal of self while aiding in releasing attachments to mental, emotional things, beliefs, feelings, thoughts and items that physically no longer serve you..This supported energy is like the mother of all foundations bathing you in universal love and hope while you explore your shadow self..

The earth will be experiencing a total lunar eclipse..This means the earth will be in between the moon and the sun along with a super moon because of its proximity of being very close to earth in its peak orbit, sending out massive intense vibes of energy for those looking to really get dirty in their shadow work..These are the things we keep hidden and contained in the closet of self that still have a way of making us contaminated that need an over all power wash and good old fashion cleanse..

I have been feeling the energy of this upcoming cycle for the last week of so..Almost in an off sense of stability way I cant describe but every now and again am reminded of how truly small we are in the scheme of things..I have noticed in particular that right now a lot of people are suffering from symptoms of vertigo, which maybe it isn’t such an inner body thing, but an outer body reaction to the ungrounded nature of the spirit that is currently being flung around from a cosmic energetic point of view..Just a thought I have based on my experience, wisdom and knowledge in seeing and feeling it from an alternative perspective..

This is a great time to use crystals as earths medicine during this moon cycle phase with your transformation, balance and restoration of self..Citrine, sunstone, obsidian (black or golden), moonstone, quartz, selenite, hematite, black tourmaline, sungite, moldivite, apatite, azurite, smokey quartz or smokey citrine quartz, vera cruz amethyst are all good specimens to use or have around you during this specific time..if you do grid work, now is the time to make and activate a grid which I personally will be doing later today!

This is probably the most perfect cycle to do this inner ancient work that is required to restore and reboot our human eco system..It is here in this particular moment that we can find the power of the universe aiding in our arrival if we just show up in complete surrender to allow the moons super intense glow to wash over us penetrating down to the deepest darkest particles of self..The sun on the other side of this powerful magical equation will be infusing us with its dancing rays, sunbathing and restoring us with its harmony of light and energy..

Happy lunar eclipse on sunday and may the magic of this energy begin to illuminate and purify your every fiber of being..peace love faith hope <3 <3 <3

 

 

 

they say signs come in 3

Do you ever have experiences that add up to 3 that are messages, almost magical and transcendent all within the same breath..

I go for acupuncture and healing on a regular basis as a form of self care to my over all health..Thankfully I am maintaining a very healthy active state of being, which is why I continue to go to instill the balance of my mind body spirit connections..

experience 1)

A couple of weeks ago, my acupuncturist who happens to be my husband, decided to use a burning technique called moxy which is an herb that is lit and placed at the point of use to generate energy and healing..

I asked during this time if he would put on some native american drumming music, that for me personally immediately settles my spirit and allows me to root into a space of deepness and quite so I can take in the treatment..as the drumming began, I slowly faded away letting go as I breathed in the aroma of moxy that had somehow transported me to a place of sacred ceremony..

I found myself in a fire circle where I could only see the golden orange rays of reddish flames before me dancing to the beat of the drumming circle..i could hear the chanting all around me, feeling the blanket of energetic warmth of the place I was currently occupying as if I was actually there in full participation..

During this divine moment, I asked to be shown who I was in this sacred space and a pure vision of the WOLF SKIN began to come over me as it covered my forehead and the back of my head draping down the back side of my body as I continued to watch the dancing flames before me..

I couldn’t tell you how long I was there because it felt timeless, almost infinite in that rich empowered moment as reality called me back to the now..I began to come back to the table I was laying on, feeling the treatment room around me as my husband watched my return and I shared the events of my experience..

The irony in this was that he had a secret hidden from me that afternoon and decided to share it with me after we returned home that evening from his office..apparently he intended on surprising me with a trip to Tucson for the largest annual crystal and gem show and to take a course on SHAMANISM and stones with the same master we learned from a few month prior when we flew to Denver..

by the way, I don’t believe in coincidence..

experience number 2)

This past Monday, I went to my other healer who I go to once a month and had another wild experience that was just as unbelievable..I was laying on the table as she was working on me doing kabbalah healing and i had a very real visual feeling while my eyes were closed that the room was becoming filled with a warm golden strobe light..

I sat with it for a minute before I looked over at my healer with one eye open to ask if she saw what I was seeing..the entire room was filled with a soft gentle golden pulse like a strobe light effect washing over and around everything as I told her what I saw..she explained that not every one sees energy the way I happen to it and that she had felt what I saw, saying that It was my beautiful energy that was filling the room..

hmm, something else I need to consider and mentally take note of..

experience 3)

The top off (because all things profound from above come in 3) is I have been looking for a camo colored travel tote bag that isn’t the easiest to find, to replace the black one I have had for the past 20 years and im picky..my favorite handbag designer, Rebecca minkoff, happens to have one for the price of $145.00 which my daughter talked me into ordering on sunday when we went to the mall for an hour..

lesson, don’t shop with someone who wants you to spend your money..LOL

Tuesday, the day after I was at my healer, I went to buy some new towels and for shits and giggles decided to run into nordstroms rack at the off chance that I would find a camo colored tote bag (its like looking for a needle in the haystack)..not only did I find a camo colored quilted cute as fuck tote bag for $34.00, but the cashier at the register told me what great ENERGY I had which is probably the nicest thing a total stranger could say to me..

cant make this shit up..<3 <3 <3 peace love faith hope

 

 

 

this is high season for the con artist..buyer beware to their new year resolution..

Here we go again, the beginning season of sloppy resolutions that people begin to make for the upcoming “NEW YEAR” followed by empty promises and a lot of noise and chatter while signing up for shit that they never intend to finish..Ive been watching just the fitness ones from my thrown of the stair machine I climb daily at planet fitness with loads of newbies piling in, hungry for the change..

Then week 3 rolls around and they begin to drop like flies until one day “POOF” they are gone and the gym is restored back to its usual self..Everything new is fun, until it becomes work or a challenge asking of your undying discipline and commitment..It requires your time and energy on a daily basis to show up and do the work required for your intended outcome and not just because its the new year..

A lot of times people give up in the newborn stage expecting perfection while finding out that results don’t happen over night and if your not dedicated to the program or the intentions, it all goes to shit..It is a valid indicator about some ones character and how they really feel about themselves in general (which alone makes you prey), where they are coming from and where they desire to be..

Truth is, a lot of people don’t have the stamina or will to truly do the inner and outer work together that is needed to survive a resolution any time of the year..Its close to difficult to stick with a plan and see it through when there are so many ways to fall of the course and revert back to the old pattern ways that are comfortable and easy..Lots of people will cheer you on in a passive aggressive way making it nearly impossible to succeed without some sort of loss in itself..

That alone can set you up for destructive ideas, thoughts and behaviors because you need healthy support and nourishment when starting any thing new if you plan on it having longevity and stamina..people want to see you do good things as long as it doesn’t cost them losing you to becoming someone new in the outcome (no one wants to be the last man standing)..

I believe that is probably one of the hardest obstacles to maneuver is finding your balance between the achievement of a resolution and people on the outside of it while finding a way to make it now work for you..A person looking to give up a habit in exchange for a healthier outlet that their entire circle participates in, will need to leave the habit and the circle if they want to succeed..that’s just the logic and reality of it..

The first week you will want to look like a hero, doing something “different” so the motivation will be fuel with the ego instead of the ingredients needed for change..The second week gets hard because it requires of you to take some inventory along with a harder looks at yourself, while your watching every one else do the thing your changing..The third week you have already cheated and are ready to go back into the circle of comfort with worse feeling than when you began your sloppy resolution..

How man times have you promised yourself something and never made it to delivery? How many times did you swear to change only to become worse out of resentment and anger? How many times did you believe something spoken 12 different ways out of the voice of the person who was never going to change? How many programs have you subscribed too but failed to even look at the content being delivered because you couldn’t be bothered? How many times was to many because you simply lost count..

They key to any kind of success is the stamina, determination, focus willingness and drive associated with the process regardless of the obstacles and road blocks because you will have to keep getting back up..manage your expectations and find someone who will really help get you to where you want to be and not just there to take your money..There are so many con artist dressed as gurus of a trade out to screw the consumer for cash, so again, DO YOUR HOMEWORK..

Create and make a viable a plan before you go cold turkey, review your past year and research, research, research what it is you wish to change and if it is even feasible to do in the environment your currently residing in..sometimes its the simplest unassuming things that require the most attention and any thing of value or worth while takes time and patience..peace love faith hope <3 <3 <3

 

 

 

 

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