eran and i were watching on face book the other day, a live stream video by a guy named derek weida who we both happen to follow who spoke about “how to happiness”..he was talking about his secret to personal happiness and the 3 foot circle around him rule he lives by which lead me to think about my own circle of happiness lately..
he explains in a very derek round about way that its not our job to fix the world, its our job to live well and be happy..you can only manage, control and influence your own circle and what is currently around you by being accepting, compassionate, loving and kind and doing what is right within your own compass..
I had a conversation the other night with my husband eran about me giving away unnecessary energy to things that in the end are not worth the sacred power that exhausts me..so i decided based on his wise advice to scrap a few colossal written drafted pieces, that BTW could have been real epic fucking blogs and created a circumference circle of happiness around me instead..my spiritual growth was more important and imperative than any of those who stand outside my perimeter, this time..
I never understood properly what the power of personal vindication meant until my 40s when the credentials as a woman, a wife, a mother, a loving human being where being challenged outside this 3 foot circle..i actually had to look up this word that constantly came into my mind to better understand this desire I have inside and why..this unafraid persona lead me to continue to give energy to some thing so utterly unworthy instead of just being able to let it go knowing my own authentic truth, however that poked scorpio is another breed, she rises like ashes of the phoenix..
you see, underneath this peaceful radiant smile there lives one hell of a fierce creature, one who in the somber moments of the morning, while im quietly enjoying my beloved black liquid gold will arise to converse about life..its her that is the actual DONT YOU EVER FUCK WITH ME persona that takes over the keys and writes as a means of personal poetic justice..most times I have no real clue what I have actually written until I go back and reread it while becoming empowered myself, because she is a badass..
that beautiful electric light keeper inside of me couldn’t stop the intense scorpio from getting angrier almost BOILING inside wanting retribution for all the smack talk and negative advice given to my daughter..so instead I inadvertently self created more drama around this idea in my mind instead of just screaming at the top of my lungs FUCK YOU ASSHOLES, while inhaling my last breath about them using the 3 foot circumference rule, allowing karma and life that will universally move around them on its own, because it will..
so for now I sit peacefully happily within this precious circle drinking my beloved black brew, creating healthy mantras that I practice .. maybe today is a good day because im not feeling as hyped to call out some motherfuckers, as a twirl of happiness goes around the wheel to our life..
sometimes in life you must take a step into your beloved boundaries and remind yourself its not always your fight..you are only responsible for the affects and influence you manage within the space that you occupy, hopefully leaving positive lasting effects that create pure bliss and happiness in the metaphorical home that really in the end only matters the most..peace love faith hope