have you ever been so taken aback by a surprise moment that you are shocked in disbelief..like how could this be possibly happening now right out of left field as your scratching your head and at the same time jumping up and down in utter joy, amazement!..divine timing doesn’t care where you are in life at all..extraordinary shit will magically show up at the exact time it is supposed too, testing you on levels you haven’t even emotionally worked on yet, simply to see if your prepared to take the wisdom you have learned thus far to newer greater heights and give you exactly what you asked for without apologies.. its ironic how a few weeks after i had my conversation with the universe, the forgotten Israeli boy from the banana fields shows back up after so many years gone on facebook..
life isn’t kidding around when it sends you potential gifts if you able to see them as they truly are..sometimes we tend to ignore the signs that we have asked for, possibly begged for, out of fear of actually having to accept the challenge and or change the course of the navigation that you are currently traveling on..sometimes these gifts are given with no strings attached and sometimes they come with lessons you on a soul level are being prepared to face..after a weeks of correspondence back and forth and eventually skype, I knew the little boy I once innocently loved in a most pure way and had the most unique profound connection too, was now a handsome attractive grown up man facing me from across the world in a very different light challenging all my greatest beliefs..
I wont lie, there was a lot of internal hesitation, pushing me to push it away, simply out of fear..i knew intellectually that he was there in Israel and I was here in Michigan, yet it was so natural to connect with him again regardless of all those lost years..its as if time erased all the years apart, and once again within the same space together we clicked energetically despite the continents and bodies of water in between my land and his..i could hear his thoughts, feel the physicalness to his body, I could smell him in a way I cant explain.. how do you deny the chemical physical spiritual attraction, connection, the beauty of one soul to another, and ignore the intervention that the divine gave to us..
how do you walk away, let go of something so unique that most dream about happening to them, because of all of life’s silly excuses and everybody’s personal judgment and negative opinion..yes I was twice divorce..yes i was a single mother..yes i had something going on I was forcing to work even though it was slowly falling away on its own..and yes, the truth was I was so scared, afraid of this certain kind of love, even though I had asked for it to show up throughout my whole entire life..how was I going to find the courage to surrender and drop everything defensively I held on so tightly too..how was I going to muster up the courage to just scream at the top of my lungs FUCK IT, and listen to the beautiful soft voice inside..i decided to not give a flying fuck anymore of what others thought, since their thoughts and opinions throughout my life failed me miserably..and decided for the first time in my life to finally show up for ME!
I ended up booking a ticket to Israel within those 2 months of communication for 10 days, to meet the man boy I once said goodbye to so many years before..i was ready to take the greatest leap of faith I was destine to take..to show the world and more importantly myself, that I have got this shit regardless of some peoples disbelief of me and my crazy adventures..my true friends whether they agreed with me or not, supported and applauded my fearless spirit as I began to step of the edge of the this metaphorical mountain I decided to climb..
I stopped caring about the whispers behind my back and what was being fed verbally to my children( disgusting things mind you), or the nasty and snarky remarks of my character that were degrading and utterly hurtful..i stopped giving a shit about the people who said they cared about me and at the same time wanted to shit all over my rainbow..i didnt give a shit any more of what others thought of me..i went limitless, no apologies, no warning, and set off to journey with or without anybody’s approval..i took a massive gamble on either loosing myself again after all the inner work I had set off to do, or the people who didn’t have my best interest at heart and left..off to Israel I went to discover and take back the impossible reunion of 2 people, 2 souls that had waited a lifetime for each other..JUST LIKE THAT!!
The first song Eran had sent me…
P.S to be continued